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I moaned and put my head in my hands. This was not good. This was really, really not good. Not only was I in the presence of a madman who I would most definately end up offending before the night was over, earning myself a knife between the ribs, but I wasn't NEARLY drunk enough yet to deal with this.
Without waiting for a reply from the stunned peanut gallery, the one and only Edward Hyde slouched into a chair, removed the vodka glass from my nerveless hand, and drank it himself. And he managed to look unbelieveably sexy nonetheless.
Damn it, it wasn't fair. I never did anything to deserve this, really I didn't. Ok, so I had a little too much to drink now and then. Was that a crime really deserving of having my vodka stolen by a raving lunatic, who would most likely kill me before I left the table?!?
Well, no one was saying anything yet. I suddenly had the urge to break the silence. "Umm...." Oh, great way to start. Brilliant. "So...your name is?" If I hadn't been so frazzled, I would have slapped myself for uttering such an idiotic question. I swear, my subconsciousness must've had a death wish I was unaware of.
Hyde gave an absolutely wicked smile. "Hyde. Edward Hyde," he purred. Shit, it was really a crime for someone that dangerous to be that sensual.
"Ah, I see. Well.....I'd better be going," I said hastily, leaping up and dashing out of the bar. Without thinking clearly, I hid in an alley right next to the bar, curling up in a ball behind a trash can. God, I promise, I'll be good from now on, I won't break any more commandments, I'll go to church every single day, just don't let him come looking for me, dear God, please don't let him come looking for me...
"'Scuse me, miss, are y'all right?"
I gave a yelp and jumped to my feet, terrified. To my utmost surprise, I saw a tall, kind-looking brunette wearing an absolutely bizzare feathered outfit watching me quizzically. I nearly kissed her in relief. "Yes, yes, I'm just fine. Who are you?" I felt chilled after asking that question, and it was only then that I realized I had probably made a really big mistake...
"Oh, I'm Lucy, miss."
I shut my eyes, and said a very bad word. Actually, a series of very bad words. Had my mother been there, she would have hit me and stuffed a bar of soap in my mouth. In the name of all that was holy, why couldn't I just move around without bumping into a major plot character? Someone was obviously hell-bent on integrating me into this plot. I felt like I was stuck in some awful fanfiction. When (and if) I got back into reality, I was going to launch a crusaide against self-insertion fics. After writing an angry letter to the writer of this play. But first and foremost, I was going to choke the life out of Jenn. I'd shove the empty tequila bottle up her a-
"Um, miss? Are y'sure y're alright?"
I shook my head in an effort to focus on the task at hand. "Yes, I'm ok. Just fine. Never better." She smiled, then started to head back into the bar. She really was a nice girl. It was only fair to warn her. "Hey, Luce?"
Lucy turned around. "Yes, miss?"
"Hyde's in there. You might wanna take a night off and go somewhere else."
The prostitute paled visibly, even in the dark of the night. "Y'know Mr. 'yde?"
"Uh....he, um, asked for you. He, um, didn't look very friendly...I figured I'd let you know."
She nodded, looking like a deer trapped in headlights, and scurried off into the night.
There. That was my good deed for the year. What little conscience I had was eased. But the problem still remained, I was sober and had no place to spend the night. I kicked the trash can in frustration, then looked down and sighed. When you has no options, the only thing you can do is lower your standards. Grimacing with distaste, I stepped into the trash can and curled up. This was, without a doubt, the worst day of my entire life. And yet, the trash can still wasn't as uncomfortable as Jekyll's floor.
I sighed, closing my eyes, and hoped that when I woke up, I'd be back in Jenn's basement.